Sunday Brunchies and Crunchies: Hungry Belly
Pillages Surprises
by Reuben Gutierrez
31 March 2013
After a long day's work in the deep wood of the
Enchanted Forest, I set out to find something to appease the
growling beast within my belly. I wondered as I wandered why each
hungry person has someplace to eat at, good things at, a delicious
little meal to please. As I turned the corner by the castle I found
a sleepy little hollow where people were eating waffles and ice
cream, their hand and utensils tearing through with a clip clip and
a clippity clop, looking for more food to chop. I needed to figure
out a plan, or the crowd would have to reason with a hungry man.
Shaking out the tunes in my head as I weaved through
the crowds, I stumbled upon a Tall Tale Inn. Nope, too crowded, the
lines are too long, I thought with a grimace, so I ventured on and
rounded the bend. Just outside the side entrance to the inn on the
outskirts of the wild frontier, I found my last chance to rustle up
some grub.

Like a mirage in the dessert, the Golden Oak Outpost
called to me with promises of a chicken dinner. The menu listed only
two entrees and while I've had many a nugget in this kingdom, I had
not yet tried the Fried Chicken Breast Sandwich. When ordering, I
was warned that it was spicy, and while not a fan of this form of
cuisine, I opted to try it for the sake of adventure. Given the
option of apples of French fries, I opted for the hungry man's diet:
meat and potatoes.


It seems that everyone in the world is out West
With food in hand, I gazed across the horizon for a
place to settle and down this meal, but alas, there was not a seat
in sight. The crowds were just too much that even this little post
on the edge of town was making bank. So as any hungry explorer in
the kingdom will do, I set out for another land to settle in.
Luckily I knew of a far off tavern in the Caribbean that seldom
opened its doors to guests, but still provided an ample amount of
seating under its tiled roof.
Despite the heavy crowds in the land, Tortuga Tavern
was not open, but luckily for me, this meant plenty of seats to
choose from to enjoy my feast. The feast was quite a surprise. The
warden at the outpost wasn't kidding, this sandwich was quite spicy,
due to whatever spices the cook tossed in the breading for the
chicken. Thankfully, they dressed my sandwich in lettuce, tomato,
and a ranch dressing; the dairy aspect helping to calm and smother
the excitement from the spices. For a quick meal, this suited me
just fine and surprised me with its quirky flavor.

As I finished my meal, I got up and stretched, and
while looking up I saw something new in this area, but very
familiar. It was a remnant and salute to the proprietor that once
served this establishment.

Do you see it?

One of the old signs from
El Pirate y El Perico
This was certainly a treasured piece of history in
this kingdom (and there's more to pillage at
Tortuga Tavern), and now it's displayed for all to discover.
With the belly beast quelled and a new treasure found, I set off out
of the kingdom feeling peaceful and satisfied at the fantastic
adventure a hungry stomach so often inspires.